I know I haven’t been around as much as I should lately. I come home late from work. Most nights I find you sitting alone at the dinner table nursing a cold bowl of soup. By the time I get home the kids are already fast asleep, and things between the two of us have been strained. For that I am sorry.

But to make it up to you I created this little video showing you why I’ve been away so much. Please understand I still love you very much and want it to work out between us two because….*sniff*….you complete me!

BTW: Don’t let the thumbnail of the toilet scare you. It just happens to be an interesting thumbnail YouTube took that I thought was entertaining.

Substance TV is back and better than ever baby! First of all, let me tell you there are a lot of changes starting with this “volume”.

No longer will Substance TV be known as “episodes”. Instead they will be known as “volumes” to greater reflect what we see Substance TV as. Each volume will focus on one game, unlike previous episodes which covered three games. This will allow us to cover each game with even more detail and care. As a bonus we can get each volume out quicker on a monthly basis.

We’re also putting a stronger emphasis on the history, designers, composers, and everything related to the game. We see Substance TV as a companion piece to each game we cover. Something that will be entertaining, informative, and hopefully you’ll leave with a bit of information you didn’t know before.

In volume 1 we take a look at Zone of the Enders: The Second Runner. So without further ado, enjoy. (For a high quality download of this volume, click here or go to the download page.)

BTW: What do you guys think of the new format and volume? Let us know by posting in the comments below.

If you notice anything out of place, send me an e-mail or message so I can fix it ASAP.

As promised, episode 11 is out! As previously mentioned, we cover Shinobi III for the Sega Genesis. We also take a look at Klonoa 2 for the Playstation 2. You know how I mentioned we had a big game up for review, well I wasn’t lying. Substance TV has the exclusive first video review of the brand new shmup from our boys at Cave, Mushihimesama Futari Ver. 1.5.

We’ve made a few additions and improvements to the show to make it more enjoyable and viewer friendly. Give us your feedback on the show. We always strive to make it better and better each episode, and your comments and criticisms help in that.

BTW: Right click the icon below to download the Windows Media version instead of streaming it. Doing so will allow you to watch the episode in the highest quality running at 60 frames per second.

DOWNLOAD:

As an exclusive bonus of being the totally awesome people you are by faithfully visiting this site, we’re giving you the release date of episode 11 of Substance TV. In production since late October, the final game I was patiently waiting for came in last month, giving me the chance to finish the episode. As a cherry on top of the aforementioned bonus, we’ll reveal one of the games up for review. For those who recognize the ninja like figure in white as the infamous Joe Musashi, you already may know.

One of the games up for review is…. Shinobi III for the Sega Genesis.

I won’t go into any detail as I’m saving that for the show, but just to put things into perspective, Shinobi III is not the most amazing game in this episode. Episode 11 will have the exclusive first and only video review of a brand new next gen game. Needless to say you’ll want to tune as this is a game you need to know about.

Speaking of tuning in, when should you? Good question. Episode 11 of Substance TV will premiere on Sunday, January 31st, 2010 on both YouTube and this website. For those who watch it here at www.substance-tv.com, you’ll be able to watch the full high quality version, with perfect audio clarity, and all while running at 60 frames per second. Oh yea, we don’t screw around when it comes to quality.

So for now, it’s back to work. See you next Sunday!

- Brian

For some time now I’ve heard the comments from fans about the missing audio from episode 4. Over the past months I’ve tried all I could to get the original audio back, with little to no help from YouTube. I’ve been searching through the old archives and finally found a version with sound and decided to bite the bullet and just re-upload the episode. So enjoy and thanks again everyone. Episode 11 is going smoothly so look forward to that coming soon!

For those you who are night owls, you might have seen some screwy stuff going on with the site this past week or so. I’ve been redesigning the site these past few weeks and can say I’m finally done. We wanted the website to reflect the new look of the show.

Here’s the short and long on what’s changed:

Of course you’ll notice the new site layout and graphics. All the navigation to the other pages is at the very top. You’ll also notice a slide bar up top. This will always have the latest updates for news on Substance TV. You can scroll through, and if it’s about the show, you’ll see it. The auto scrolling sidebar to the right constantly cycles through the newest posts. It also displays on every page so you can easily access the latest posts no matter where you are on the site. Below that is the newest episode of Substance TV (episode 10 at the moment) for your constant viewing pleasure. The title labeled “Partners” is just that. Sites that we are proud to be affiliated with will be prominently displayed. As you scroll down, you’ll find the login panel. At the very bottom of the site are some added features. Past the goofy pic of us under the “About Us” heading, you’ll see Twitter updates to the right. Now you can keep up with our Twitter updates while your on the site. To the left of that is our new Flickr photo stream displaying our latest uploads and pics. Best of all, our forums are fully functional and ready to go. You can type from left to right and the dialog box doesn’t go off the page so check them out.

It’s been a bit of work, but as with everything we do, I think it will be worth it. Most importantly, give us your feedback on the new look and layout. We want to make sure it doesn’t suck. Enjoy!

After months and months of work, episode 10 of Substance TV is finally out! Up for review this month is Donkey Kong Jungle Beat (Gamecube & Wii), Castlevania Dracula X (SNES), Astra Superstars (Sega Saturn). It’s been awhile since the last episode, but we think you’ll think, or at least we hope you think, it was all worth the wait.

Both Erik and I want to thank all of you who have supported us this far. We’ve been up countless hours getting this all ready. Though at about 5 A.M. on Saturday morning, Premiere was screwing up, so I wasn’t even sure if it would come out. I was this close to saying screw it, but I hunkered down and kept at it. Luckily it started behaving and allowed me to export the show later that afternoon.

If you dig the show, and I would guess as much if you’re here on the website, then spread the good word that is Substance TV. Host a dinner party with friends, hold a Substance TV bingo party, or even invite friends and family for a Substance TV ice cream social. However you celebrate, we condone and wholeheartedly support you.

Now that we have all the new graphics and such done, we can focus back on getting the show out every month. Well, ummmm, that’s about it, so enjoy!

Download (HQ MP4 added!)

Although updates on the site have been sporadic, there’s been a lot going on behind the scenes in preparation for the upcoming tenth episode of Substance TV. But this isn’t just another episode, this is the rebirth of Substance TV as you know it.

I’ve received a lot of questions surrounding this change. It’s been in the making these past few months, and Erik and I are proud to announce Substance TV episode ten will be released October 10th, 2009. As I’ve stated before, there will be some major changes. I’ve been a bit silent on the exact details, and although I can’t tell you everything, I will announce a few things:

- Substance TV will now be in widescreen! Now any game presented originally in widescreen will be shown as such. Any game natively 4:3 will remain that aspect ratio. There will be no goofy stretching or zooming. We want to preserve the original picture settings as much as possible.

- The entire show is getting a new overhaul. And I mean a overhaul. New logo, graphics, color scheme, website, intro, game titles, outro, credits, animations, and so much more. Pretty much a rebirth of the series. Both Erik and I want this series to really shine and be as good as it can be.

This of course begs the question, why? Why redo everything? The main reason we decided to reboot was because Erik and I never got to collaborate on the show from the get go. From episode one until four, it was just me doing everything. Once episode five came around, my good friend Erik came along and did a new intro and took on some extra work. It really helped because doing it all alone was becoming a real time hog. From then on, he continued to help and do more until he just became part of the show. Now I couldn’t imagine doing Substance TV without his hard work and dedication. It’s a nice balance.

The problem was, we were pretty much patching and adding on to what I started. And while it worked, it wasn’t as good as it could have been had we both started from episode one. We had always talked about doing some sort of reboot, but we weren’t sure how or when. After episode nine, it kind of just clicked that episode ten would be the perfect rebirth.

Add to that, we’re always looking to do better. We don’t want to become stagnant and rest on our laurels. We want the show to look professional and be as amazing as we can possibly make it. Hopefully that is what episode ten will be.

That’s it for now. Stay tuned in the coming weeks as changes and details will be made clear. For now, it’s back to work.

P.S. For those that haven’t seen, here’s the teaser for episode 10:

Many a year ago, Erik and I had a little tradition. We didn’t really have a name for it. It was just a night of gaming. Each week we would go over to my house or his and do some gaming till the wee hours of the morning. From these gaming nights came the inspiration for Substance TV.

Since he moved out of town, those days are in the past, but from time to time we’ve managed to take a trip to one or the other’s respective town of residence (I know, that was such a smancy fancy way of saying it). Interestingly enough, we’ve never recorded our gaming nights.

On the weekend of August 7th, I took the four hour drive from Wichita, KS to Springfield, MO to visit my good friend, and co-creator of Substance TV, Erik Neal. The whole weekend we played every video game from old to new. It came to our minds that we should record our killin’ for posterity’s sake. The following video is a collection of the best clips from our night of gaming. Footage is from Street Fighter Zero 3, Urban Reign, Mario Kart Double Dash, Soul Calibur IV, and Bionic Commando. Enjoy! Maybe someday, when and if Erik moves back into town, these gaming nights will be a bit more frequent.

In episode 5 of Substance TV, we covered the games of SNK. One of those gems was Fatal Fury: Mark of the Wolves. At the time, the only home consoles versions available were for the Sega Dreamcast (expensive) and the Neo Geo AES (very expensive). The Dreamcast port was good, but not as good as it could have been. That and these days it’s hard to find.

Seems our cries have been heard as SNK has released MOTW for both the PS3 and Xbox 360 in the form of a digital download. All for just ten smackers. Not too bad I say. And the port is very good. I dare to say it’s about as perfect of an arcade port as you can get. The game also has online play. Though it isn’t the best netcode so there are lag issues. So don’t expect to be able to have a zippy tournament match with you bud across the country. But for the price, you can’t beat it.

Well, what are you waiting for, go download it already.

BTW: King of Fighters 98 has also been released, and although I’ve not played it personally, I hear it’s a good port as well and the netcode is better then MOTW

Recently, Dusty Wenton with www.examiner.com interviewed lil’ old me. I then go on to blab on about this and that. From Substance TV to the current state of video games, I just can’t shut up. So, if you enjoy reading my ramblings, then you’re in luck! Thanks to Dusty for interviewing me thereby giving me an even bigger ego complex.

Interview with me, myself, and I

As stated before, this episode we cover Project Justice (Dreamcast), R-Type Delta (Playstation), and Y’s Ark of the Napishtim (Playstation 2). Plus episode nine is now available for download in high quality in both Windows Media and Quicktime formats. Umm, well, I have really nothing more to say, but enjoy the goodness that is Substance TV.

Top picture is a good old ninja theft from Pineconeattack

Download

As promised, episode nine of Substance TV is out!

This episode we cover Project Justice (Dreamcast), R-Type Delta (Playstation), and Y’s Ark of the Napishtim (Playstation 2). Well, I honestly don’t have much to add except go watch the show. Leave a comment a let us know what you think.

Ya know, this site is named www.substance-tv.com. So it goes without saying that this site should have news about and concerning Substance TV. It’s come to my attention that, as of late, the site has been quite devoid of any information concerning the show it is named after. I hope to remedy this error with some news on the upcoming Substance TV episode nine.

First and foremost, episode nine will be released on May 20, 2009 at www.retrowaretv.com. Along with that, all the older episodes will be up and available for watching there as well. One of the games being reviewed has already been revealed in another way. For those who listened to my guest appearance on Pinekast 14, you were privy to said information. As for the other two games being reviewed, let’s just say we’re being a little secretive. I may be giving out some clues in the days to come, but I think the agony of waiting will make it all the more worth the while.

Also, as Erik and I have been working on episode nine, we’ve also been working on episode ten at the same time. To be honest with you, I’m more excited about episode ten then I am about nine. Now that’s not to say nine is any less of a show by any means. But episode ten will be a turning point for Substance TV. If you’ve enjoyed the quality, workmanship, and care put into each episode, you’ll be (in best George Steinbrenner voice) “BALLOOOOWN AWAY!” by what happens beginning with episode ten. I don’t want to say too much more, but needless to say, we’re aiming for even better.

That’s about it for now. On a side note, I had a great birthday today. My family prepared an especially awesome birthday party that I will be sharing all the details of in the next few days.

So instead of figuring out how to get avatars working, I just took the work of others, copied and pasted it.

What you need to do is create an account at Gravatar. It’s important that the email you use there needs to match the one you use here; or if you prefer, you can add more email addresses to your new Gravatar account. Now, the idea behind Gravatar (now owned by Wordpress) is that you use one main place (Gravatar) to store or link avatars for global use, as long as wherever you are posting supports Gravatars.

Basically you will have the same avatar wherever you go. And you can easily add more, change them, whatever.

So, by signing up there, you should automatically see your avatar added to our comments, if a bit small. Working on that right now.

There is a small amount of trust involved here though O.K.? I can set the ratings of the avatars, but I trust the members of the site pretty much, so feel free to use whatever you wish. Just keep it fairly classy. If it’s not safe for work, it’s probably not safe here. People breaking that rule are going to be warned, ridiculed and then ban hammered, and since I have yet to ban anyone that wasn’t trying to market ‘hotsexxxygurls’ to our readership I’d rather never have to.

So here’s the rundown:

1) Go to Gravatar

2) Create account with or by adding the email you use here (you can change it in your options if you wish)

3) Upload your own or link whatever.

4) Post freely, all excited that we are using a feature from 2005 =)

In the weeks to come I’ll be making and uploading custome Substance TV avatars so you can use it as I know these are in HIGH demand.

this is a total ninja theft from Pineconeattack

When you get older, birthdays tend to come and go without much notice, but I’ve forgotten one important birthday this year. No, not my Aunt Themla’s. She’s an icy cold corpse of a woman who’s beauty and wits faded away long before we threw her into that mental institution. I’m talking about this website. One year ago on April 2nd, this site was born.

And I want to thank everyone who has been a part of this whole thing. The site started as a simple, and quite crappy, static frontpage. Now it’s, well, a little less crappy. All I wanted is a place to host high quality versions of my videos, but now I’ve got a readership as well, who for some reason beyond my understanding, enjoying reading my ramblings as well as watching the show. I’d also like to thanks sites like Superior Version, Pineconeattack, Screwattack, and RetroWare TV for plugging the site and giving us views.

So happy late birthday www.substance-tv.com. Don’t get wasted on cheap bandwith and easy servers. You’ve still got work to do.

Out with the old and in with the new. So from now on, visit: Substance TV forums. The link to the new forums will also be in the top bar as well.

End of line.

BTW: Episode 9 is in production. Look out for details in the weeks to come.

First of all, I have to say thank you for the warm welcome over at RetroWare TV. Episode 8 was a big hit. I’d also like to thank all you folks here on the website for your support in this time of transition. I know it may be a bit weird for some that Substance TV is no longer premiering on this website, but that’s all the more reason to go check it our over at RetroWare TV. It’s been a great move and we’re excited to be a part of it all. Plus they’ve got a lot of other good shows you might just enjoy.

That being said, you get exclusive access to something none of the other websites have, full quality downloads of episode 8 and all past episodes. So I’ll dispense with the pleasantries for now and let you have at it. Enjoy!

Download

As promised, Substance TV episode 8 is finished and ready to go. To be honest, it’s been done for a few days. So obviously you’re asking why isn’t it uploaded? Good question indeed.

About a week ago, Erik and I were contacted by John D. over at RetroWare TV. Long story short, he asked us if we would like to be a new show on the site. I talked to John over e-mail and even on the phone about all the details. Afterwards, Erik and I talked it over, and a few days ago we we accepted their offer.

Now what does this all mean and what has changed? Nothing really. The only major change will be that all future episodes of Substance TV will now premiere on RetroWare TV’s website www.retrowaretv.com. Then after a few days, the show will be on our website, Youtube, and all those other places. So you’ll still be able to download high quality versions of the show, watch episodes through the podcast, and even Youtube. It’ll just be a bit delayed.

And no, there’s no big cash payoff or exchange of money in some secret Swiss bank account. And there’s no change of ownership or change in what we can and can’t review. This joint venture is good for both sites. For RetroWare TV, it gives them another show to add to their lineup and another reason to check out the site. For Substance TV, it gets the goodness out there to more people. We’ve always enjoyed RetroWare TV’s stuff, and they’re a good bunch of guys who just enjoy playing video games. So we’re honored to be a part of it all.

I’ll be the first to admit that episodes of Substance TV have not come out as fast as Erik and I would like. All that will change with this move as we will be putting out a new episode of Substance TV every month. Substance TV will still be committed to putting out the same quality review show each and every episode.

Episode 8 will premiere over at RetroWare TV’s website on Tuesday (3-10-09). I would have loved to get it out this week, but both us and RetroWare TV needed time to make the changes and get things ready.

Both Erik and I want to say how much we appreciate our fans and folks that have given us support over the years. I want to say a special thanks to Borman over at http://superiorversion.com/ (previously Past to Present Online). Back when I was first starting this show with no website, and no know how, Borman personally hosted my videos on his site. It was very gracious of him and he gave me my first real break. I also want to thank Jangofatt and the crew over at www.pineconeattack.com. They always throw some lovin’ our way whether it be in the form of articles on their website or mentions in the podcast. They were one of the first websites to give Substance TV notoriety. Plus they themselves have great content as well.

And this news is exclusive to you few fine folks who visit our little site. We wanted to give you a heads up and let you know what was going on.

Well, that’s about it. Remember to check out episode 8 on Tuesday at www.retrowaretv.com. And we’re already working on preparations for episode 9.

Thanks for all your patience. I can tell you it will be worth the wait.

I’m very thankful for all the fans of Substance TV. You fine folks make this whole ride much more enjoyable. But of all my fans, I have a new favorite. One who rises above the rest. That would be none other then gameidiot.

Who’s this gameidiot you ask? Well he’s an interesting character. Simply put, he’s my father-in-law. Yep, you heard me, my wife’s dad is a fan and member of Substance TV.

It all started this week. My mother-in-law was visiting from out of town. She is a florist and agreed to come and help at a local flower shop for Valentines Day. Though my father-in-law was still out of town because he had to work, but he was going to be in town later this week. One evening my mother-in-law tells me she heard about Substance TV from my wife. We have a little chat about it and I think nothing more. Unbeknown to me, she proceeds to tell my father-in-law, Gary, about Substance TV. So Gary, being the resourceful guy he is, looks up the phrase “Substance TV” on the internet. He finds my show, and watches it. He watches it again. Then he shows his co-workers. Like a proud papa who sees his kid on the evening news, there I am.

Now please understand, Gary is about sixty years old, but he’s young at heart. He’s got a collection of of Mr. Potato Heads. Yes indeed-y. From Darth Tater to his newest acquisition of an OSU Mr. Potato Head, it’s pretty impressive if I do say so myself. And that’s what I love about the guy. He couldn’t play a video game to save his life, but he enjoys watching them like you wouldn’t believe. And every time he’s in town, we usually gather around the old TV and play some games. Well I shouldn’t say we because it’s me playing and him watching, but the experience is the same.

So when he arrives in town later this week, one of the first things he mentions is Substance TV. He just goes on and on about how he really enjoyed watching the show and all the descriptions and banter. He was honestly interested about the how it was all created and came together. And even though he had never played Mega Turrican, or Strider 2, or Power Stone, we had a conversation about it all. Throughout the day, the show would get brought up again, and we would talk about it more. It just made me feel good. Knowing that the show got a guy who is more then twice my age interested in video games is pretty cool. Ha, and who says people over 50 only play games on the Wii. One of these days I’ll get him playing Power Stone. You just wait.

So because of all the above reasons, gameidiot will always be a special member here at substance-tv.com. If for no other reason then the fact he could fill me full of lead and bury me where no one would ever find me.

BTW: On a side note, I’ve never been one of those guys who mentions every project he does to family and friends. It just always felt pretentious. It’s like that episode of Siefeld where George’s fiancée is going to meet with Jerry and co., but George can’t allow ‘Independent George’ and ‘Relationship George’ to meet. “A George divided against himself, cannot stand!”.

The goal for Substance TV has always been to provide thoughtful and educated reviews of the best in video games (in other words, not sucking hardcore). Though when creating the first episode I never figured we’d have a website. But because of the support of fans like yourself, a website was the natural next step. With my limited knowledge of website programming and coding (Wordpress FTW), a few bucks, and a crazed mind, the legend began. Over time I’ve tried to improve things and added what I could.

In an effort to make the website better, I ask one simple question: What else do you want to see on this website? More content, better forums, extra contests, or pictures of ferrets wrestling in grape jam? Whatever it is, we want to know! We want to continually improve upon what we’ve built. So, either post a comment here or shoot me an e-mail at:

brian@substance-tv.com

BTW: Street Fighter IV is gonna rock my pants off!

Sunday morning I’m awaken by my alarm. I turn it off and after I get up and around, I go check my e-mail. Once I log onto my Gmail account, I am greeted by quite a sight. Over 40 e-mails over the course of the night. Now as much as I’d love to say I get that many e-mails that aren’t spam or penis enlargement ads, I can’t. This was an unusual thing indeed.

The e-mails were subscription notices from YouTube, and if you’ll recall from last time I experienced this, it was from a feature on a website. So I go to the first likely suspect. Good old ScrewAttack. And what do you know, Substance TV episode 7 is featured! I gotta say, that made my day. I even got a chance to call Erik up and tell him the good news.

So yet again, I heart Craig. Well, in a strictly non-sexual way. I mean he’s a good looking guy and all, I just don’t see us together in that way. Maybe if things were different and…….oh yea, sorry, got a little off track.

It’s good to see ScrewAttack still featuring content by average joes. Because of the g1 Sunday Submission, shows like 2-bit Gaming, Still Gaming, and many others have been thrust into the limelight and given some much deserved attention. I’ve been exposed to a lot of great videos, podcasts, and just plain awesomeness thanks to ScrewAttack’s Submission Sunday. I also enjoyed reading everyone’s feedback and comments. I’m grateful you folks enjoy our little show. It means a lot to know that people out there appreciate the work you do and honestly enjoy it. To all the old and new fans of the show, thank you so much. It’s been said a million times by a million people, but without you, we wouldn’t be where we are. Sure, we’d still do the show, it’s what we love to do. But to have fans that come back every episode is an honor.

So enough of the sappiness, it’s back to work on episode 8.

www.screwattack.com

Another episode means another lineup of games. Now for the faithful and diligent viewers who watched all the way till the end of episode 7, you got a little bite sized Metal Gear treat wrapped in gooey gaming innuendo. Three small clues about each game were given. Some of you figured it out, while others were left scratching their heads. The three clues given by our friend Ocelot were:

“A flying kid who shoots lazer beams”
“A winged girl with a crystal spear”
“A boy who battles evil with the help of a bird”

As cryptic as some of those clues were, a few of you guessed correct. Want to see if you were right? Then click on!

Here is the list of games up for review in episode 8 of Substance TV.

Title: Astro Boy
Developer: Treasure
Platform: Gameboy Advance

Title: Odin Sphere
Developer: Vanillaware
Platform: Playstation 2

Title: Astal
Developer: Sega
Platform: Sega Saturn

So there you are folks. Things are underway and we’re hoping for a release very soon. And remember, Eye. Have. You.

Over the past few months, I’ve had some folks wondering if there were any plans to release Substance TV on DVD. And to be honest, I’ve had the thought every now and again. If the demand is there, then I’d be more then happy to give out the lovin’ on DVD. As far as cost goes, I would only charge what it cost me to produce it. Pretty much the cases, printing, and discs themselves. They would be relatively cheap (I’m guessing under $10).

So, simply put, would any of you fine folks be interested in a DVD for Substance TV? Post comments, questions, or concerns below and cast your vote.

Well it’s been a long time coming. Substance TV is now available as a podcast on iTunes. Now when a new episode is uploaded on the website, it will be availible soon after on the iTunes store. You can subscribe and have the show automatically downloaded. Just another way to spread the goodness of Substance TV. Like spreading peanut butter on a piece of fresh toast. Mmmmmmmm, sweet creamy Mr. Peanut genocide.

iTunes link

Well, you’ve all been good little girls and boys. I’ve been checking my list, and I thought and thought of a gift worthy of my fans. What could I get them that I know they love. I was so afraid of getting something the wrong size, or color, or smell. And as I pondered, it came to me, why not give a gift I already know they’ll love. So I give you the gift of Substance. Substance TV 7 that is. Below are the links to this blessed goodness.

Enjoy it my little tikes, but don’t eat up too much. You’ll rot your teeth.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Download

So, after many months of searching, I have found a suitable option for recording the video needed for Substance TV episode 7. Though it’s not perfect, it’ll do the job for now. I’ve got Christmas break coming up, so in the middle of family, friends, and a myriad of other people, I’ll be working on getting things wrapped up, and maybe, just maybe, have a present wrapped under the tree for you folks.

Well, time is a wastin’.

With the 2008 presidential election behind us, one would think their duty as an American citizen was completed and they could go one with life as it was, but those people would be sorely wrong. Now a much more important vote is upon you. Not for president, but for Screw Attack’s “Gaming’s 1337″ nomination.

As your host of Substance TV, I ask for your vote in this upcoming nomination. If elected, I will lower taxes for The Mushroom Kingdom and expand housing projects in the Green Hill Zone. I will continue to negotiate with foreign leaders such as Bowser, King Dedede, and Donkey Kong to ensure a lasting peace. I vow to increase our military force by ten fold with the help of General Bill Rizer in our fight against the forces of Red Falcon. I will help small community leaders such as Mike Haggar of Metro City fight crime and clean up gangs like the Mad Gear.

All this and more will I do if I am voted as best video game reviewer.

So, how do you help you ask? Simple, just follow the link below and nominate me as best video game reviewer and/or any of the other applicable fields. It’s important to note you can only vote once per day. Though I appreciate those who would vote for me 50 times a day, and I truly do, your votes would then not be counted which would be sad for all of us.

So go on and vote. It’s your civic duty!

VOTE NOW!
http://www.screwattack.com/Nominations

P.S. Yes, I’m still working on Substance TV 7 for those of you wondering. Look out for it soon!

We’re not guys who likes to be late, and as much as we’ve tried to avoid it, Substance TV 7 is not out on October 1st as previously set. Yea, I know, it’s no biggie, but it bothers us. I’ve been working on it on my side as time permits, but some technical difficulties have hampered the progress. That and having every in-law known to man come and visit hasn’t helped either.

So instead of ignoring it and trying to push on without bringing it up, I figured I might as well let you fine folks know what’s going on. There’s no need to panic or kill a goat and sacrifice it to the gods of gaming. All is well. Once these small hurdles are resolved, things should be quickly wrapped up in the next few weeks. As such, I won’t be on here much posting witty comments or interesting stories as I want to devote any free time I have to working solely on the show. After that I’ll continue to bore you with my dull wit. Thanks for your patience and understanding.

Now, back to work…

Over the past few months, I’ve had a few viewers ask me why don’t I give “scores” or “points” to games I review. While this may be popular in other video game review shows, magazines, or in general, I find it annoying and useless…

Think about it. Let’s say a reviewer gives game “X” a 7.8 out of 10, while he gives another game a 3 out of 10. Of course it’s quite easy to see which game is better. Problem being, there’s more then one game video game out there. In fact there’s quite a few from what I understand. Problem number two, what if game “X” gets an 8.3? Are you really saying to yourself, “Wow, an 8.3? Well shucks, had the game been an 8.2, I would have never bought it, but that extra 0.1 really got me all jazzed about it!”

You’re right, no sane human being would ever say such a thing (hopefully you wouldn’t say “jazzed” either). Then you have a myriad of different scoring systems from 1 out of 4, to A+ to F, then there’s the this percent out of 100%, and the list goes on and on. It’s all a bunch of inconsequential mumbo jumbo worth about as much as half a mosquito fart (yes, that is a quantifiable measurement). When it comes down to it, all that matters is should you buy the game, or should you not buy the game. In this day and age of $60 video games (I still can’t believe it myself), why mess it up with this bull? Either the game is worth the money, or it’s not.

So, I’ve simplified it down to basics. We’re not in school anymore, and I don’t expect people to memorize a bunch of meaningless figures. It’s just as simple as “Yes, buy the game, it is good”. Ah, but you say, “Brian, you review so many great games, I cannot afford to buy them all. You crack dealing video game fiend, I am ruined!!”. While I hear your cries, not to worry, you don’t have to buy every game all at once. Think of it as a little checklist of sorts. Once you buy a game, check it off the list and move on. Collect them all even!

Then others say, “Yes Brian, I am so filthy rich I can eat magical unicorn buttholes all day. So I can afford all the games you review, but in what order should I buy them?”. Yet another astute question. The answer is, whatever order tickles your fancy (that’s phrase always sounded a bit odd to me). I try and review a wide array of games so that at least one game in my many reviews will suit your tastes. Then after that, be adventurous and try all the video game flavors.

I would end this with some little quip or smart remark, but I’m all out at the moment.

As promised, the games for review in Substance TV episode 7 are revealed. Yea, I know, there’s a picture that shows them all up there anyway, but here’s a list for kicks and giggles (in order of review even!).

Mega Turrican – Sega Genesis

Strider 2 – Sony Playstation

Power Stone – Sega Dreamcast

Thanks for all the suggestions so far, and I’ll be keeping many of them in mind for future episodes. As posted before, episode 7 will be out on October 1st, 2008. While I could wax eloquently, I think I’ll get back to work on episode 7.

P.S. – Thanks again to all the fans of Substance TV for all your support! You folks rock this world upon which I stand.

With episode six in the bag, it’s time to move onto episode numero seven. We are already in production. And before you ask, yes indeed, we have all three games picked. Oh, you’d like to know what those are? Well why didn’t you say so, we will be review-ahhhh you almost got me. You’re good. We’ll be officially announcing the list of games to be reviewed on Wednesday (9-10-08).

What we can tell you is the seventh episode will be released on October the first (10-1-08)! So until then, stay tuned for more updates and check back Wednesday for a full list of games.

P.S. A big thanks to all of those who have signed up, e-mailed, posted comments, or posted on the forums. It is greatly appreciated!

Over the years, some of you have said, “Brian, we love the games you review, but we can never find them, and even if we do, they are insanley expensive”. Yes my child, I have heard your cries, and now I answer those hunger pains. Suckle on the sweet nurturing teet of Gradius 5.

As announced in episode six of ‘Substance TV’, I will be giving away a complete copy of the game, including shipping, for free. What do you have to do, it’s simple. Just register her at www.substance-tv.com and you will be automatically entered into the contest. You’ll see the link at the top left of the website on the sidebar. There’s no gimmicks or hooks. You won’t be on some Russian goat porn e-mail list, unless you’d like to be. Just a good old fashioned contest.

I’ll announce a winner in episode seven. If you’re already registered for the site, well, then you are already good to go. Thanks for all your support and look forward to episode seven in the weeks to come.

As promised, Substance TV Episode 6 is out! Although it’s technically a day or so late, we’ll just say it came out on time for kick and giggles. I had a small technical problem which held up production for a day, but that was quickly resolved. Up for review is Jackal (NES), Ninja Warriors (SNES), and Gradius 5 (PS2). I could go on and on, but it’s pretty much pointless. Go and download the goodness.

Youtube

Download

So I wake up this morning, have some breakfast, spend some time with the fam, and then check my e-mail. Nothing out of the ordinary. When I get to my e-mail, it’s flooded with tons of messages, around 73 to be exact. Most, if not all, were subscription notices from Youtube. This was highly unusual as most of the time I get maybe one or two subscriptions a week. Curiously I check my Youtube page to see what all the hub bub is about.

I look at my last episode of Substance TV, and after a bit of searching, I look under the ’statistics and data’ drop down menu. I see a link from www.screwattack.com linking to the video. I figured maybe somebody had clicked on the link from the message boards and got the topic bumped up and it somehow caught fire. I click on the link to see what this was all about, and to my surprise, I’m featured on the site! Yea, it’s crazy.

I had submitted the fifth episode for the Sunday submissions. I thought nothing of it. Figured it would be worth a shot in the dark, but instead, they choose it. So now I’ve got a lot more people seeing my stuff. Of course, I’d still do it no matter how many people see it, but it’s nice to recognized by a pretty major site such as Screwattack.

Big thanks to Stuttering Craig and all the members at Screwattack who have come over to check out the site and my videos. It’s good to see such hard work be seen by a lot more people then would have without their help. Check them out at: www.screwattack.com

I can tell you with all honesty, I’ve consumed more phlegm, snot, boogers, and other various mucus like substances in the past week then any normal human should ever have to in a lifetime. Now that I’ve got the disgusting details out of the way, we can move on.

I had a bit of a minor cold this whole last week, and as any good husband would do, I passed it onto my wife and child. So I imagine you’re asking yourselves, “What does this have to do with Substance TV?” Well, because my nose was clogged up with all this junk, I was not able to record voice overs for the sixth episode of Substance TV. Everything is still on schedule, but I’m just a bit behind. Hopefully I can get things finished up in time and ready for you fine folks.

And yes, I’m doing much better and the entire family seems to have gotten over it.

Now you can enjoy full quality versions of Substance TV for download. All episodes are available in both Windows Media and Quicktime formats. No longer are you slaves to the poor encoded Youtube slop. You now have a choice. Substance TV 5 is the first episode up for download. Through the coming months, other previous episodes will be available as well. Enjoy!

Substance TV 5 – SNK special
Quicktime
Windows Media

No, this is not a mirage, this is the truth. Substance TV episode 6 will be out on or before August 31st of 2008. I know, it’s crazy. Another Substance TV in the same calender year as the last. I may be spoiling you, but you are all so precious to me.

Thanks to a new job, I have a lot more time on my hands for the next couple of weeks, so I am taking full advantage of it. So of course you know what games will be in the next episode, but what other surprises await you? Click on to read about a little contest…

Yes indeed, a good old fashioned contest. No, not bobbing for apples or a pine car derby, something much more interesting. What will you win and what are the rules you ask? Well, all I can say is that is involves one of the games up for review this episode. And trust me when I say the prize will be well worth it. Stay tuned and check back for updates in the next few days as I’ll be revealing more about this contest, how you can enter it, and what you can win.

Until then, sleep tight (or loose if you like).

Episode 6 of Substance TV is currently under production. It will feature Jackal (NES), Ninja Warriors (SNES), and Gradius 5 (PS2). At the moment, much of my life is being taken over by an adorable and cuddly little human being I like to call “baby”. So I’ll be busy for quite some time, but not to fear, soon you’ll have your Substance TV. The wait, although painful, will be worth it once you attain this bliss that is episode 6.

Look out for it in the next few months!

UPDATE: Substance TV 6 will be out on or before July 31, 2008! Look out for it in the coming days.